The woman applying for a job in a Florida lemon grove seemed way too qualified for the job.

Foreman: "Look Miss, have you any actual experience in picking lemons?"

Woman: "Well, as a matter if fact, yes! I've been divorced three times."

* * *

There were three guys talking in the pub. Two of them are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives, while the third remains quiet.

After a while one of the first two turns to the third and says,

"Well, what about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?"

The third fellow says "I'll tell you. Just the other night my wife came to me on her hands and knees."

The first two guys were amazed. "What happened then?" they asked. "She said, 'get out from under the bed and fight like a man'."


* * *

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends.You order what you want, then when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that.

* * *

At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other replied, "Yes, I am, I married the wrong man."

* * *


After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." She replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."

* * *


A lady inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Husband wanted". Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

* * *

The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said, "I've found a man just like father!" Her mother replied, "So what do you want from me, sympathy?"

* * *


When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.

* * *


Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.

* * *


A little boy asked his father "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

* * *

Young Son: "Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"
Father: "That happens in every country, son."

* * *


"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late."

* * *


A woman was telling her friend, "It is I who made my husband a millionaire."

Friend: "And what was he before you married him?"

Woman: "A billionaire."

* * *

During a heated spat over finances the husband said, "Well, if you'd learn to cook and were willing to clean this place, we could fire the maid." The wife, fuming, shot back, "Oh yeah??? Well, if you'd learn how to make love, we could fire the chauffeur and the gardener."


* * *

When making love, most married men fantasize that their wives aren't fantasizing.

* * *


How do most men define marriage? A very expensive way to get your laundry done free.

* * *


The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.

* * *

First guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"

Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

READ MORE - Men and Woman Jokes

Mediterranean style of eating patterns can make us healthier and longer age. Condition? Should consume lots of vegetables and seafood. Plus "a little" red wine and enough rest. More healthy body and life expectancy is longer.

Mediterranean style diet has many benefits. If done correctly, then the disease such as heart attack, high blood pressure, to some types of cancer would be far from you. Enough nutrition experts recommend that this type of diet. Need not be bothered to read the user guide for more diet, calorie count, to search for food that are difficult to obtain. This diet is very simple, but delicious. So what, is, in fact this Mediterranean style diet?

This diet is actually based on the traditional meal pattern, countries located in the Mediterranean Sea, such as Greek, Spanish, Portuguese, North France, Morocco, Turkey and Southern Italy. Cuisine in each country that may feel different and also different techniques cook. But if we look more detailed, in fact there is one similarity. Overall use fruit and vegetables that quite a lot. Plus seafood, olive oil, garlic, spices and fresh red wine. They only use a little red meat and milk. It also rarely use the sweet and the food is preserved.

Live longer
Monash University's research appears to support this opinion. Compared with Australia, the heart attack on migrants from Greece is below average. But her children, the descendants of the first Greek in Australia, had a heart attack a number approaching the average. What is it? Apparently eating healthy tradition of ancestor is replaced with more food, red meat, fast food and sweet food.

Health in this Mediterranean style diet can not rely on one food only, but a number of variations of food. For example, the use of olive oil that many will contribute to a high-monounsaturated fat and low saturated fat and polyunsaturated. Tomato, garlic, red wine, and vegetables provide antioxidants high womb. While seafood contributes omega-3 fat is good for the heart.

Lifestyle factors
Research shows sports, stress reduction, and social support have contributed to reduce the risk of heart disease. If you look at how to cook Italian or Greek, they went to the local market to get fresh ingredients and not over-cook. Fast food or food terproses rarely used. Similarly, cultural food take away the style of Western also rarely found.

Not seldom they walk or bicycle to nearby villages to do the sale and purchase agreement. Many of the food prepared by hand, not with the tool. Similarly, a variety of vegetables each day that quoted from the garden. More kesegarannya guaranteed. All this activity will endorse a more healthy body. This healthy dish can also strengthen ties in the family and community. You can eat lunch together with a relax, and resumed the day of rest. Create a day that relaks with the family to stay healthy.

Switch to olive oil
Olive oil contains more than 70 percent fat "good" mono-unsaturated. Highest abortion among other types of oil. Extra virgin olive oil with the cold-pressed process has natural antioxidants such as vitamin E, such as in polifenol and karotenoid. Extra virgin olive oil is also low so that the acid is suitable for salad and vegetables are cooked. Pure olive oil is usually a mixture of extra virgin oil saitun and processed. Suitable for this type of cooking.

Create a healthier pasta
Pasta often considered a fat food. But the sauce is pastanya that contribute to more obesity. To be healthy, use in the Mediterranean style of topping up your fettuccini. Try tomatoes, or tomato-based sauce, chili, zucchini and other various vegetables. Add the seafood and fresh ingredients such as basil or oregano.

Use garlic
Garlic has been smooth flow of blood, reduce cholesterol, and improve blood vessel elasticity. In raw, garlic also contains the ability antibakteri way stop bacterial growth and also the evil fungus causes fermentation.

Tomato
Tomato is very popular in the Mediterranean region. Can be used in pasta, pizza to be sliced for salads or dried. In addition to source vitamin C, tomatoes contain lycopene, antioxidants for a Mela-wan oxygen free radicals. Lycopene is what makes tomatoes red. Tomato cooked with the oil tambahakan will add power to the body absorb lycopene.

Try a variety of seafood
Fish and other seafood, such as squid and oysters, contain omega-3 fat that powerful. There is also a protein and mineral contents such as Iodine and potassium. Omega-3 is known for its ability to reduce the risk of heart disease with a lower triglyserida (blood fat) and prevent the occurrence of heart trouble tap (arrythmia). .

READ MORE - Healthy living With Mediterranean Way